This morning I left at about 6AM I went to Pangasinan. I arrived at about 9am I feel very sleepy the whole time. I helped my mom around a bit there. I wont go over the details because I’m already tired. When it was about 3 PM or so, we left to return here in Angeles. I arrived at about 6 PM then, I ate and watched the news and see what’s happening at the Election’s Quick Count (quick na yung lagay na yun… :D) that isn’t quick at all. After, I thought of not writing today and just listen to muic until I sleep. But while I was listening, I remembered something sad…
You see, Lell had this stupid attitude of his again and had a small argument with Khei and that small argument turned big again… I remembered when he texted me and nag-senti-senti siya… I was laughing at that moment. Pinagtatawanan ko siya but then, bigla akong naawa nung sabihin niya na “Baka nga hindi na bumalik yung dating friendship namin. Kasalana ko kasi.” I remembered when I keep repeating the phrase to them both, “When you have a glass and it fell to the ground and got broken, you can never bring the same pieces back together when it was new.” I don’t mean to totally break their friendship but as far as I can see, they can never bring it back again. They’re strong bond that was always there wasn’t there anymore. They were both my friend but even if, I can’t help them. I tried to fix things for them pero wala talaga. Kusa na silang lumalayo sa isa’t-isa. Hindi ko alam kung bakit but everytime she’s making moves to fix things he either refuse it or guluhin lalo yung situation. I guess somehow, naiiintindihan ko siya pero mahirap talagang i-explain yung line of thingking niya. Magulo. Ewan ko ba. Aawayin niya tapos, iiyak-iyak siya afterwards. Everytime na she gets hurt, he gets the same twice as much. I remember nung naging sila, he pretends to be happy everyday cracking stupid, corny jokes over and over again everyday to comfort himself off the pain. I saw him cry not once, twice but several times already. Nakakaawa talaga siya. Whenever her BF hurts her, sa kanya siya tumatakbo… Bagay na bagay nga sa kanya yung song na “Kung Ako Na Lang Sana” by Bituin Escalante. Kaya lang wala talaga eh… Mas masakit nung nalaman niyang she also loves him but she loves her BF more and of course, she can’t love him back. Para siyang pinagbagsakan ng lagit at lupa nun. He changed a lot just for her. He don’t smoke and drink anymore just because of her… Parang to show her how he loves her. Then, sa sobrang sakit, hindi na niya yata nakayanan ang he tried to smoke again and show her, he smokes again. This was stupid! What he did was stupid!! She got angry with him after seeing it. Yun naman talaga yung gusto niya. Gusto niya na magalit yung girl sa kanya ng todo-todo as in sinusumpa na siya sa galit. Why? I WILL EXPLAIN!! (I felt the same thing when he left me… *sob* *sob*) In my view, gusto niyang everytime na makikita niya yung girl, may sinasabing bad yung girl sa kanya and he wanted to hear it from her mismo. Of course, masakit yun but it doesn’t even compare a bit of what pain he was feeling at that moment. He’s in the middle of a dilema na iisa lang ang kapupuntahan. That is losing her. He chose to forget her pero hindi niya daw kaya so he tried to stay and absorb every bit of pain and eventually, sumuko din siya. He goes out with other girls just to forget her pero wala pa rin. I you would ask me, sana pinabayaan na lang ni Khei na umiwas siya. Kasi kahit anong gawin nila, wala na rin yung friendship nila eh. Lalo lang niyang pinahihirapan yung situation. She already chose between her BF and him. And he chose her BF that time. With that, it is only natural that she would lose the other one right? It’s the rule, you chose one, you lose one. You choose both, you’ll lose both. You choose neither, both will stay but you’ll lose the love. Sabi nga nila “Time heals all wounds.” I admit that my wounds hadn’t healed totally.Whenever I see him, my wounds bleeds thought not as much as it did. I’m hoping this wound would heal someday… I know that the scar this wound will left me would stay with me through eternity.I think in time, his wounds would heal as well, but it would take a long long time.
