Suicide Note

Dear God,

Everyday, form the moment I woke, I wondered painfully of it was all right for me to be by your side. I wondered if I was still qualified to walk in Your steps. But even as I wondered, I loved listening to hymns in Your praise. I loved watching the candlelight ceremony.

I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry. Because of me, there will be people who will question You. But I can accomplish the greatest atonement, they will probably cease their mouths. No one will ever dirty your name again.

There will be no compensation for disgracing You as I have. There will be no way to erase my sin. But still I wish that…

I’m sorry, God. Please grant me an execution.


Morizumi Setsu

For some reason, I grew fond of collecting suicide note. It’s such a waste to just keep them to myself, therefore, I thought of sharing them with you.

This note was taken from Diamond Head. Setsu e-mailed it to his best friend, before he jumped off the a building. After enough investigation, they found out that when Setsu moved with his parents to US, he couldn’t stand the emotional damage he was getting so he took drugs to forget them. Even when he returned to Japan, he was so addicted that his body craved for it no matter how he wanted to stop. Even so, he still wanted to stop.

It was after he died that they found out why they never see him attend masses even though he loves God more than anything. It was because he always stay hiding behind the altar in those times. Maybe because he never had any face left to face his creator.

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  1. He jumped because he is addicted to drugs? He should’ve just went to a rehab. Anyway, too late for me to say that.

    I don’t believe that you’ll go anywhere when you die. So may he rest in peace.

  2. @ Chino ~
    I don’t know about you, but I think rehabs doesn’t really work and/or rehabs doesn’t work for all people. I had a friend who’s gone to the rehab for 2 years, when he got out, nothing changed. He was thrown to Australia for another rehab. When he returned, he became worse.

    @ Najo ~
    Not even once in this lifetime I wrote a suicide note. However, I am fond of collecting suicide notes and reading them over and over. It always takes me back to that feeling of who I really am.

  3. if I’d ever write a suicide note, it’d be written in a wall or mirror… and in BLOOD. LOL. *okay, nothing funny… tsk!*

    anyway, that’s interesting. He committed suicide coz he couldn’t take and decided to give up. RIght? That’s usually it… *sigh*

  4. @ Gean ~
    Diamond Head is a manga.

    @ Jellie ~
    I think, he committed suicide to stop himself from craving for more drugs. That’s the only solution he could find.

  5. i think he jumped because he was ashamed of himself that he still craved drugs although he knows it’s wrong. he thought he had disgraced himself in God’s eyes?

    just joining in the opinion-giving hehe.

    i missed this site, euri. welcome back. ^o~

  6. Suicides notes are someone soul who have strayed, weaken, hunger, and the lost. There last words are there only way to speak their mind, there voices long gone shattered and broken.

    i was once one of them… if I hadn’t defeated my depression surely I will be part of your collection.

  7. @ Nicole ~
    I collect them because I find them beautiful. Of all things, I find suicide notes the most truthful reflection of a person’s soul.

    @ Vincent ~
    You can always write suicide notes however many times you wanted. But you can only kill yourself once. If you feel like writing, how about donate them to me? I would love to add them to my collection. However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you kill yourself as soon as you donate them.

  8. Mmm, suicide notes. I have to agree with you on finding them the most truthful reflection of a person’s soul. I never thought about collecting them though. I wrote a suicide note once. I don’t know what happened to it though. That was a long time ago…I’m really glad I don’t feel the need to do such things anymore. 🙁

    I really need to upgrade WordPress. What a pain it’s gonna be, reinstalling all my stuff. I think I’ll leave that for a weekend project. Right now I’m too busy with school and work (only two weeks of school left!!!).

    Sorry to hear about your site getting hacked 54,937 times! That really sucks. My site (saturninedream) has only been hacked once – and they just changed the index page, that was it. Very small hack and easy to correct. I haven’t had any problems since.

  9. I collect them because I find them beautiful. Of all things, I find suicide notes the most truthful reflection of a person’s soul.

    I totally agree. Although I haven’t written any suicide letters, nor do I plan to do such, they may be considered as the “most truthful reflection of a person’s soul” simply because the words are written at a time in a person’s life where they are on the verge of either turning back or continuing the plan of committing suicide.

    It’s like a testimonial to the world that he/she has made a decision to end the borrowed life, but also demanding for time to stop, shouting that Mother Earth lament for Her loss. Beautiful yet… sad.

  10. @ runawaycat ~
    Hey dear, suicide notes are interesting. I’ll get that site done first and I’ll inform you when I had uploaded them.

  11. why do people enjoy reaing suicide notes?
    because it’s simply a true reflection on a person’s soul.
    Read Kurt Cobains
    it’s the most honest thing I have ever read in my life.

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