I haven’t really finished my project yet but then, business comes first. Seriously, this morning, he called me and asked me if I could make a site on a rush. I said I can make a site on a rush but I do not accept those kinds of request at the moment because I’m on the process of finishing my project first! And at the end, I was talked out on making it. (*ugh!* My project!!) Then he came over *yey* and gave me the details. To my surprise, the site doesn’t really have anything of interest for a content. I’m not really good at thinking “what else could I add to make this damn site draw visitors” so it took me practically a half day just making it. If only the one who wanted the site was there to give the details it would be done in a hour or two! But then again, I’m well compensated to do that. That was suppose to be some guy’s final project. When I think of it, a website? For a final project? Heck I would do anything to change that software project to just a website project. But then again, I dream! I read a mail a while ago, that says exactly as it is below though I won’t mention who mailed me that.
I asked because it still bothers me your question of what I would tell God after I die and he did really exist. 🙂 I am not so sure of my beliefs after all… But then, if I am sure of my belief, I would just be like the rest of the fools, I mean foolish people, out there (i.e. Christians :-)).
“Huh? What?”, you say. Okay, I will explain. Sometime ago, (I think it had been a month or more) one question entered my mind: What if the end of the day comes today, and as it was written in the scriptures, Jesus came back and God will take all those who believed in him to heaven and left the rest to Hell. Or to simply put it, the judgment day comes. Would I regret being an Atheist? I remembered I had asked this question to the group as well just to see if we have the same sides. But then, only a few answered the question. Maybe because I did not make separate topic for it. But then again, I was glad that those answers I received are somewhat close to mine. My answer was this: As an Atheist, I will honestly take all responsibility for disbelieving but I will not regret that I have been one (if ever I became a Christian) nor regret that I am (now). How could I say such things you might want to ask me. My answer is simply, because I would rather be burned to eternity that lie to myself that I believe such being exists where I know he doesn’t. If by any twist of chance I may someday eat my words and kneel before God for that I had doubted him, I would still be very much thankful that I had once became an Atheist for “Any belief worth having must survive doubt.” A friend once told me in a forum, “You believe in Love yet not in God.” Honestly that question struck me so I think hard and asked myself “why”. But then again, my thoughts lead me back to the quotation, “Any belief worth having must survive doubt.” I didn’t reply to his statement but inside me I know that I had survived that doubt. I did not not believe in Love until it just came my way. Then, I had proven that Love exists. But I haven’t proven that God exist, so I would remain an Atheist from the day I doubted until the day I would prove his existence. Don’t you go hitting me with question like, “what about your friends?” I have only one aswer to that… “Any belief worth having must survive doubt.” Maybe that’s why I love this quotation so much. Because it alone answers most of the question I have. It alone, though maybe thoughtless for some, is everything I am and what I believe. And it alone gives me strength to go on.